Why do we search for happiness all the time? Its not happiness that we really seek. It is the search that we need. We need the search, however disappointing the outcome of the search is. We keep choosing to search for a ‘permanent happiness’ that deep down we know we will never find.
Why, given this, do we keep searching? Why do we need this? The search brings many experiences that do not make us happy. These are what we really want in order to reinforce to ourselves that we actually exist. That we are here. That we are real. This is the reason we need to keep searching. We see that when we have joy, freedom and bliss we forget who we are. The sense of being me, of being I, has dropped.
And this, deep down, is terrifying. We don’t like this. It creates a fear of being no-one. So we set up a search for a false goal in order to experience not being happy, which is guaranteed to remind ourselves that we exist. Even though it is an unhappy existence for more time than we want. This searching brings to us situations and people that remind us that we are separate from them. This makes us know that we exist, as a separate me, as somebody, and not as nobody. We search for this unobtainable goal of permanent happiness because, through this search, we create edges to bounce off. These creates definition for us. Without an edge we are nobody. And to be nobody is something we simply can’t tolerate. Even though deep down we know that we are beyond our identity of me, or of I. And that we are perfect as that. And that everything and everyone is OK just as they are. So instead choose to relax and fall into not needing to be somebody. Just for a short while. Fall past your fear of being nobody into what follows. Forget yourself and find your permanent joy, freedom and bliss.
- JM -